Last Saturday, Deb and I headed to Dewey Beach to meet up with the rest of her family. I wasn’t sure quite what to expect but I wasn’t expecting that first night. It was a night that is going to be talked about and laughed about for years to come. But I am getting ahead of myself a bit…
Deb and I got up early and headed out to get some breakfast. We knew that the ride was going to be a long one and we really wanted some coffee and greasy diner food in our bellies before jumping in the car and taking that long ride to Dewey. We were really glad we did too because it took us almost an hour just to get beyond Pennsylvania Avenue and the ramp to 295.
Traffic was a crazy. We should have realized it was going to be that way…beach traffic…on a Saturday…yuck. When we got to the Bay Bridge we thought we had it made because we just cruised right on through on the EZ-Pass lane. Little did we know that we were going to be put onto the bridge with all the traffic leaving the beach.
Two way traffic on that bridge is just not fun at all. The 126 miles from door to door took us almost 5 freakin’ hours.
But when we arrived the fun started right away. We had just enough time to say Hello to everyone and drop off our stuff in our room before we were grabbed by Lauren, Mike, P and Red to go out for “a” drink. So we headed down to one of the beach-side bars and started with Orange Crushes and Peel-n-Eat Shrimp. After we each had 3 or 4 drinks we moved to a different bar and started in with a few beers each. We were all getting a bit tipsy when we decided it would be best to go back to the houses and see if dinner was ready. It turns out that we go there just in time too. So we all packed some more food into our bellies (that were already full of booze). showered and changed and headed back out to the bars. This time we had a few more party people in tow.
We headed back to The Starboard and proceeded to down round after round of Orange Crushes and a few shots of tequila thrown in for good measure. As the hours passed the crowd was noticeably younger than most of us at our table. Soon, there weren’t even any tables left in the bar as they hauled them all out to make room for more people to crowd in and we were left with the only table in the bar. And that is about when the fun kicked it up a notch.
Suddenly, next to our table, appeared a young woman and her counterpart. They seemed to have just blinked into existence right next to our table. They appeared to be trying to suck each other into their respective mouths as they dry humped against the wall at the end of our table. We immediately started hooting and hollering at the couple…who just continued on oblivious to us. It wasn’t until I stood up and started filming that they noticed our entire table was focused on them but that didn’t stop them.
P and Red decided to embarrass the couple and get right up on the wall next to them and do an exaggerated version of what the lovebirds were doing. We were dying laughing as they were bumping and grinding and doing everything they could to make this young twosome realize how ridiculous they looked.
But it didn’t work.
Instead of getting embarrassed all this did was egg them on. The young lady grabbed a chair and started giving a (pretty well done, mind you) lapdance to her man. We were all kind of sitting there enjoying the show when Mike hit me in the arm and yelled out, “WHY AREN’T YOU RECORDING THIS?!?!”. I fumbled with my camera and only caught the last 5 seconds of her lapdance…but trust me it was fun to watch. We all applauded and wolf whistled as loud as we could for the youngsters until we were silenced by what she did.
She turned the chair right around to Red and smiled and patted the seat in challenge.
OH. NO. SHE. DIDN’T!!!
Everyone’s eyes turned to Red to see what she would do. It was too loud to hear her exact words but it sure looked like she said “Oh…it. is. ON” before she grabbed P and threw him into the chair. By this time a crowd had gathered around our table and everyone was watching the show. You can watch the video to see why all of us, all of the people around us and even the young lady who threw down the challenge had to admit that Red was the clear winner.
The entirely spontaneous way this just erupted was so freakin’ funny. The way that P and Red started out just trying to poke a little fun at the teenyboppers and ended up defending their “honor” had everyone rolling. I don’t think I had laughed that hard in ages.
Couple of things to notice at the end of the video:
- The amount of flashes going off around the bar when Red was giving P the lapdance. I am thinking that you two are all over the Facebook pages of people you don’t even know.
- Watch as the lapdance ends and P slams the fifty on the table. He obviously liked it.
- P was kind of bummed the next day, “Man, that was my favorite hangin’ out shirt too”. Someone is gonna be sewing those buttons back on.
And this was all at just the first bar of the night. And this was just the first night of the trip. I knew right then that this was going to be a fun trip.
The next day was spent mostly hungover for the majority of us so it was pretty much a wasted day. Everyone was feeling pretty shitty. Some of the group decided to go back out again during the afternoon but were paying for it later in the evening when the rest of us were just starting to feel normal again.
The following day was spent just hanging on the beach and trying to stay cool. It was a miserably hot couple of days and it was a full time job just trying not to sweat to death. But once night rolled around it started to cool off enough that a few of us decided to go try and grab some grub. We ended up at this restaurant that was facing the bay called Venus on the Halfshell. Even though we looked up the place online and found a bunch of reviews that weren’t all that flattering we decided to go there anyway. We were more than pleased. We arrived right at sunset and had a great little table outside. The outdoor area is a tiered whitesand porch with palm trees and tiki torches…it felt like you were sitting in Hawaii having dinner. And nobody ordered anything that they didn’t really like. A phenomenal view, great food and really good people. It just goes to show you that you really cannot put too much faith in the online reviews.
All in all, it was a really nice couple of days at the beach. I didn’t feel as out of place as I thought I would as everyone went out of their way to make me feel right at home. With the exception of the self inflicted hangover pain….every other minute was enjoyable. Even the Hawaiian Night forced dancing and merriment was fun. I hope the video of me doing the twist is lost in a wipe of a certain couple’s harddrive. Thank you all for a fun couple of days.
The Last Image of Our Last Day on the Beach