Tomorrow, being the day before Thanksgiving, is historically the busiest travel day of the year. And this year it appears that traveling on a plane is going to be probably about the worst possible way to travel. With the new TSA screening procedures that are in place there are a growing number of people in our country that are up in arms about being scanned and/or patted down. Because these people are upset about this new process they plan on having a National Opt Out Day.
What does this mean for all of you planning to travel tomorrow? It means that, if there are enough people that actually plan to go through with this, you will either need to get to the airport hours before your flight or plan on having some sort of backup travel plan for when you miss your flight. You see, the plan is for as many people as possible to refuse being scanned and bog down the TSA officers by making them have to pat down as many people as possible. Their agenda is to overwhelm and make the entire security process come to a virtual stand still on the busiest travel day of the year. So for all of the rest of us that have no political agenda and are just trying to get home to visit friends and family for the holidays it sounds like a lot of fun, doesn’t it?
You know what I really wish? I wish that every person that “Opts Out” of the scan is moved to a separate area of the airport. This area, let’s call it the “Holding Pen” will be one that is only manned by one TSA official. Don’t take the security away from the rest of the passengers that want nothing more than to get home. And let’s make sure this one official is the one that is always late to work, been written up a few times for subordination, closely resembles the scariest person you can imagine and hasn’t showered or brushed their teeth in weeks. This way those people that are expecting the TSA officers to be the pervy/scary bastards they are being made out to be all over the news get their heart’s desire. This way, on Friday, when they finally reach their destination and missed Thanksgiving they can gloat about how right they were.
Meanwhile, the rest of us will quietly go about our business and get to where we were going with as minimal a delay as possible. While I am on the couch slowly slipping in and out of my food coma between seeing the Lions and Cowboys lose their games I am hoping some of those assholes that Opted-Out are still trying to reach their destination. Maybe someone will save you a piece of pumpkin pie…I know I wouldn’t.
Oh…I almost forgot…Happy Thanksgiving everyone!